Hail up Massive!
I finally managed to finish off my long promised DJ Mix. It's that straight up dj shizzle juggeling, that Fyah, that latest!!!
If you dont meet me on campus, download it free here and burn it!!
Much love

DJ Shizzle

Download link:
http://www.zshare.net/download/99506689df37ac/

Dis da di most funny Trini Translation ever lol...!!


USA: Aren't those pants a bit short?
TnT: Yuh expekin flood or wha?

USA: Sir, please don't throw my luggage like that!
TnT: Buh wha trouble is dis? Boy stop flingin meh grip so.

USA: Lift the hood of the car for me John.
TnT: Yute-man, fly de bonnet nuh!

USA: I love you girl.
TnT: Ah rell check fuh yuh, yuh done know.

USA: Oh the poor little boy is handicap.
TnT: Look at de lil invalid...

USA: It's time for a perm.
TnT: Gyul, yuh head need straightenin bad. Yuh doh see all de gren-gren showin.

USA: I have a stomach ache.
TnT: Oh gorm.............. meh belly gripein meh.

USA: He has no manners.
TnT: He doh have no broughtupcy.

USA: WOW!........... he has such a bad body odor
TnT: Yuh doesn't bade?....... oh shims man...... yuh smellin stink!

USA: Josh is suffering from Attention Deficit Disorder.
TnT: Dat chile too dam harden.

USA: He has a touch of Dyslexia.
TnT: He duncee fuh so.

USA: I need a bottle of Pepto-Bismol... my stomach hurts.
TnT: Ah need ah purge bad... ah cork up.

USA: It's been a long time since I've seen you girl.
TnT: A.. A...! You still alive gyul?

USA: Oh my goodness, we have lost electricity.
TnT: Jeezanages!!...... current gorn again.

USA: Here Kitty kitty.. get down from the roof.
TnT: Ey yuh ole dutty stinkin cyat, come off de bleddy gyalvanize before ah drop two stone in yuh tail!

USA: This meal is not too bad.
TnT: Wha doh kill does fatten and wha doh fatten does purge.

USA: Oh my, your feet are so ashy.
TnT: Is how yuh foot and dem look like yuh was kickin flour so... yuh couldn't a rub lil coconut oil on yuh foot?

Lord man unu trinis no have fi a go an so rude lol!!

I am now on the air every Wednesday 4pm - 6pm live at the KSU radio station Owl radio. My show is called Caribbean vibes with reggae and dancehall. Playing nothing but the best!!

If you guys wonder how to listen it's simple. When using windows media player simply click file--->open URL --->and paste the following URL into the URL field:
http://www.live365.com/play/339019?

Or simply just click Ctrl + U and paste the URL.

Tune in! There are also other very good show's that play! Tune in anytime and check us out!
Other good show's are:
Perry @ 12pm on thursday's with Hip Hop and Rap
Sex Talk on Wednesday's @ 10pm
and many others. Check them out on www.KSUradio.com under schedules.

To all my listeners today thank you very much for tuning in and big up to Kadie for calling in! If you missed my show I have a rerun on Sunday nights at 12:00am... very late so dont miss my live show!!!

No watch no face!!

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS


Smart man + smart woman = romance

Smart man + dumb woman = affair

Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy


********


OFFICE ARITHMETIC


Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee = production

Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime


********

SHOPPING MATH


A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.


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GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS


A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.


********

HAPPINESS


To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.


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LONGEVITY


Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.


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PROPENSITY TO CHANGE


A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.


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DISCUSSION T! ECHNIQUE


A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.


********

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED


Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

30 things you would assume if you only knew about life in America through television


1. Every phone number in America has a prefix of “555-”

2. Every grocery bag being carried out of a market, down the street, or into someone’s kitchen must contain one loaf of French bread, and a bunch of parsley.

3. Every lady getting out of bed to investigate a strange noise in the middle of the night will always do so wearing her sexiest negligee and glorious makeup.

4. A hero can have bad guys beat on him for 15 minutes without showing a single reaction to the pain, but will winch when his girlfriend applies iodine to a cut on his face.

5. If several cops are killed, at least one of them was in his last week before retiring. If only one cop is killed, HE was in his least week before retiring.

6. If a couple is sleeping in the same bed, strangely cut sheets and comforters will stop at a man’s waist, but go over the top of the lady’s bosom.

7. Any group of children playing will stumble upon something for which the police
have searched for months in vain.

8. Any door and lock in America can be shimmed with a credit card, unless it is mounted on a burning building with four children behind it screaming for help. In this case, 10 firefighters with a battering ram cannot bring it down.

9. The water will always be hot enough and bathroom temperature cold enough that all you will see is an outline of the person in the shower through the steamy glass door. The only bathrooms in America that have shower curtains are ones that have dead bodies in the bathtub, and the curtain must be pulled backed to reveal those bodies.

10. Dogs will always growl at something evil, but no one will ever take them seriously until it is too late.

11. No group of ranking officers at a crime scene will ever be able to figure out what a rookie patrol officer can see at a glance. This officer, however, will always be ignored by his superiors, who will later try to take credit for his or her discovery.

12. There is never a police car available to respond to any emergency call, but always 15 available to help investigate the crime after it occurs. Eight out of ten cops at the scene are usually just standing around, but the hero always approaches the one who knows exactly what is going on.

13. A detective pulling to the side of any city street at night will always see five to ten prostitutes walking up and down, but the one he randomly calls over to his car will always be the one with the information he needs.

14. In a martial arts thriller, ten kung-fu villains will approach the hero, and then obligingly dance around while he takes them out one at a time.

15. When a villain runs a red light in a car chase, two cars from the crossing traffic will always spin out wildly while screeching to a halt, but never manage to hit the bad guy’s car. If the hero is being mistakenly pursued by the police however, he will make it through the intersection, but the crossing cars will always hit the first pursuing police vehicle, which will cause five of the other cop cars giving chase to rear end each other off the first one. No one will be injured.

16. Instead of killing the hero outright, the villain will always make some threatening speech, in which he confesses to every detail of his alleged crime and confirms everyone’s suspicion. This will allow the hero to get untied and get the villain’s gun. Come to think of it, if he was going to shoot the hero anyway, why did he bother to tie him up so well to start with?

17. Any hero or villain running illegally across a busy street will always be hit by the last car they would have needed to avoid to have made it. The hero will never be seriously injured. The bad guy, however, will always be killed.

18. Any time of day or night, anywhere in the city, there will always be a convenient parking space available in front of where the person being filmed needs to go.

19. In any attempted murder, the victim will always be hospitalized and unconscious in a private room, and the killer will manage to get into the room through the second floor window to try again. During the course of this attempt, a nurse will always walk in with tray full of drugs, which she will drop with a loud crash. Then she will scream, but the killer will never chase her, and will abandon his murder attempt. The nurse will continue to run screaming down the hall, past the first two officers responding to her cries with drawn guns. The bad guy will always, however, make it out of the building in spite of the sixteen cops and security officers who are chasing him, even though the screaming nurse hadn’t told anyone what was going on or what the evil doer looked like. This intuition must have been how the cops knew exactly what room to which to respond to begin with.

20. No matter where the action takes place in America, the mob boss will always have a deep, raspy voice with a heavy New York accent, a burning cigarette, and an untouched glass of whiskey in front of him on his desk.

21. Police responding to a call will always blare their sirens, which can be heard
for several blocks, even when common sense would have indicted a more silent approach would have been proper procedure.

22. Even in the nosiest environments like a dance club, the racket will obligingly decrease in volume to avoid drowning out the dialog by the main characters.

23. In every opening scene at a beach, there will be a close-up of two spectacularly developed young women with blonde hair and glorious tans strolling by, wearing the skimpiest bathing suits possible, even though they have no part in and nothing to do with the story.

24. A victim of violence will always have a single trickle of blood coming from the corner of their mouth.

25. Every police officer responding to an emergency call will draw his gun, hold it with two hands, and kick in the door – never first testing to see if the door might not be unlocked or if they even are at the right place to begin with.

26. No matter how long the fight, or how many times they are punched in the face, no one ever loses any front teeth.

27. A woman pushing a baby carriage will always end up in the middle of a shoot-out or a car chase. However, neither she nor the child will ever be injured-just frightened.

28. When parked in a group, the radios of several emergency vehicles will always broadcast messages one at a time, as though they are all on the same frequency, but with slightly different female voices.

29. When responding to a call, police cars will always take at least one corner at high speed causing their rear wheels to spin out, after which they will always regain complete control.

30. At the scene of a police investigation, no matter what the nature of the crime, someone will always be dusting for fingerprints.


I also thought there would be more crazy stuff like this happening in the U.S.... well actualy not really. I dont watch that much TV anyways!

BELIZEANS DON'T SMACK U, WE F U UP.

BELIZEANS DON'T GO TO A PARTY,WE GO A DANCE.

BELIZEANS DON'T JUMP PEOPLE,WE DUN DEM BOMBOCLAAAT

BELIZEANS DON'T SAY WHATZ POPPING,WE SAY WAAH GWAAN!!!

BELIZEANS DON'T SAY GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE,WE SAY MOVE YUH BLOODCLAAT FROM YASO...

BELIZEANS DON'T SAY HE GAY,WE SAY BATTY BLOODCLAAAT BOY GO SUCK YUH MADA!!!

BELIZEANS DONT WORK, WE JUGGLE..

BELIZEANS DONT SAY LOOSER, WE SAY "YUH A PUSSYHOOLE

1. Never ask where yu man has been, where him coming from or where him going Don't always feel him going to another woman. If yu treated him right he will soon come back. If him don't come back, well you have to work pon dat!

2. Always make sure de food deh pon de table when him come thru de door. Member, "regular fried dumpling keeps your man a humping".

3. Don't forget the "Irish Moss" and "Guinness". A nuff ah dem like pork, but just don't call it pork ... yu mad! Call it a fancy foreign name like ham or franks! Ah it dem mother did grow dem up pon.

4. Never get upset if he accidentally sleeps with yuh friend, sister, or even mother. That only means he is a good man, dem would have never slept with him if him was worthless! Is dem fault fi a pressure him!

5. Never tell yuh man seh yu pregnant - well, not til yuh hide him passport!

6. Never ask how many baby mother yuh man have. Dis may lead to embarrassment because him may have lost count.

7. If him grab yuh up! Tell him that's not how to show love, some think that is the way but don't call de police. It don't mek no sense, because you always end up bailing him out of jail.

8. Never tell yuh man is not your real hair! Dem love long hair gal. Keep telling him dat you're half-Chinese or yu have Indjun in yuh family.

9. Don't listen to your girlfriends advice, especially if dem don't have no man. How can someone with no man tell you how to keep one. Dem always telling you that 'him controlling yu'. She just want someone to keep her company because she have no man. Some of dem even have funny intentions.

10. Never ask to drive your man's car, or give him directions, or tell him to ask for directions when he is lost. Him soon find him way! Grin and bear it.

11. Never ask for your man's home number and address ... some ladies get this strange idea after seeing their man fe three years and having several children for him that this somehow entitles dem to dis privileged information. Be realistic! The relationship is still in its early stages. However, your man might feel generous and offer up his cell phone or pager digits. Be grateful!!!

By: ME!!!! So stop buggin a playa!!